| Leadership. |
So this morning I wasn't feeling so good so I just went up again to spend some more UDT with the terrible twosome. Lily trusted me enough today to touch her face and she was so happy to get her forehead and bottom of her ears scratched. I watched her every movement to pick up when she was confident and when she wasn't, when I should turn my foghorn off her, when I can apply a little more pressure. There's a 50/50 chance I'll get it right when she wants me to do something and for the most part I seem to be doing quite well with trying to understand what that is. As we were moseying about from grass patch to grass patch I tried to get my legs in sync with her front legs because I know that the pattern seems to calm her. She has been licking me a lot over the past few weeks and I'm not sure whether it's because it's affection or because I taught her to lick the back of my hand before she got a treat to discourage nipping/grabbing. I think it's affection because she licks my arms, knees, shoulder and sometimes forehead (yuck!) and not just the back of my hand.
I called Benji over after a while so I could spend time with both of them and Lily pinned her ears back and tried to move him away. He pretty much ignored her and we hung out. I tried to find Benji's itchy spots with little success and was trying to prove to him that my whole existance is not just to give him treats. After an hour or so of being in the herd I started walking up the field to put the electric fence that we used for the tracter and topper to get through without letting the horses out. I said my goodbyes to both and started walking up and they both followed! Lily will follow me frequently now but Benji not so much so I was happy about that. It got me thinking that I must've been a good leader today.
I then started to think why, out of 3 dominant ponies, was Benji the leader? I thought of the qualities a great leader needs and realised that Lily wasn't fair as she will try and tell Benji/Molly off for little reason nor is she courageous enough. Molly is not interesting/provocative enough for two exuberant horsenalities to follow, she never wants to play and only wants to eat. Benji, although the smallest, is a very subtle leader to the unknowing eye. Those who don't know could say that Molly was because she moves Lily about a lot. But Benji is a fair leader and will only exert his leadership upon Molly and Lily when they challenge him or don't do as he asks at phase 1 or 2. He doesn't have to prove himself constantly, he engages in play with Lily to keep her happy and eats/reserves energy a lot to keep Molly happy. He doesn't spook easily but he'll move his feet if something poses a threat to his herd. He's sensitive but not too sensitive and isn't hot headed. Although it obviously annoys Molly and Lily sometimes that he's boss hoss, he doesn't care because it is what it takes to keep them safe. I think he is a great leader and has helped sort out the herd dynamics.
I look at how Benji interacts with the two mares and know that I could certainly learn a few leadership lessons from him to become a better leader for him and Lily. I can also easily see why Benji thinks he is boss out of the two of us sometimes if he is leader over two big cob mares. I think fairness is a huge quality when it comes to leadership both with horses and the rest of the world. It's the knowing when to praise and when to reprimand that makes it tricky but hey, we've got a 50/50 chance and they aren't bad odds. |
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My name is Lucy Middleton, I'm 17 years old and from the United Kingdom.
I started Parelli in January 2008 and it has been an incredible journey so far.
Pre-Parelli I did the best with what I knew but now I know better; I want to do better!
This is my blog to document my progress as a natural horseman.
Want to 'follow' my blog, fellow blogspotters? Add my url to your list on your dashboard to stay upto date!
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I am owned by this gorgeous piebald cob mare, Lily. She's an interesting character, fun to play with and is a great teacher.
There's more about her on her own page.
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It's not about disposable horses; it's about relationships for life.
It's not about quick fixes and artificial aids, it's about savvy; true understanding and expertise.
It's not about winning and others losing; It's about win-win: you and the horse need to feel good.
It's not about me me me; It's about changing the world for horses, becoming a person of knowledge and influence, and sharing what you know.
It's not about fear and doubt; It's about unconditional love and trust.
Love for the empowerment of others and trust that you'll never ask the horse to do something that would hurt or diminish his dignity.
Reveal your horse. Discover your potential. Live your dream.
-Parelli
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Profile designed, made and coded by Lucy Parelli Student.
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